pishirogane | prismatica

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[He loved her, so fucking much. How many people had a girlfriend who would make fun for shedding a tear, let alone feeling a bit of overwhelming run-off? How she could keep herself so even all the while... she really was such a strong person.

He nuzzled her hands and managed to stem the flow, if only just a little; he wasn't about to become a complete mess, but there was no way he wasn't bearing fresh tear streaks.]

I-I'm okay... how do ya stay so cool?

[She would wipe away his tears all the same, cupping his cheek as he nuzzled.]

Well, I'm not sure what exactly made you cry. What's on your mind?

[He took a breath to steel himself, despite the fact that her hand on his cheek felt so damn nice. The Ware Wolf Shop owner knew having him get down on one knee would cause something awkward to happen, maybe for a laugh, not knowing the relationship he had. But Naoto not only helped back everything up and try to get to the bottom of things, but they were still together like this in the snow, rather than silent and wondering if they would do something else to escape the embarrassment.]

Y-y'know when ya feel a huge fuckin' weight off your shoulders, like you almost fucked up but got through things okay... and then your eyes just start runnin' and feel like they ain't gonna stop? It's like that.

I'm just really happy as hell to have you!

Ah, yes, I know that feeling.

[She doesn't get it often, but to have that much stress building on the mind, of course one would overflow from it. She smiles at him, keeping her hands on his face.]

I'm happy to have you, too, Kanji-kun.

[His heart felt like it swelled, and he wanted to get his hands on a canvas or a sketchbook as soon as possible... taking a walk in this snowy, sparkling forest was the perfect idea, and he was so glad to be here with her.

He moved his hands over hers. As his eyes closed, he stopped to enjoy how warm her hands were. Matching jewelry... he loved that. She'd never wear anything like the stuff he liked and a collar would be t-too much. The rings? Those were subtle. Kind of secret. Their own.

Kanji gave her hands a squeeze.]

...S... Sa... sa-sa...

[Was it odd to use the code now? To open up the possibility? Maybe it was cold in the forest, but... hadn't they mentioned cable cars in the brochures...?]

Sawatte... kuremasu ka?

[Feeling him squeeze, her face proceeded to burn at his question. She was doing that right now... though, this had to be the code, right?]

... I reserved a cable car for us. If that's something you would like to do.

[Squeezing his own hands back, she let her thumbs brush against his knuckles.]

[Briefly, he'd considered replacing 'touch' with 'eat'... but maybe that'd be a little much. He'd done enough embarrassing things for one day. His stomach tied into a knot as he nodded; it was something he'd like to do.]

If it's somethin' we would like to do.

[He nuzzled and offered a little smile.]

Or we jus' go on a cable car ride and celebrate bein' together on an alien planet that ain't lookin' to screw with us for once. One drink? Two?

Ah... yes. If it's something we would like to do...

[But with that answer, it sounded as though he was more than open to going.]

I... suppose a few drinks wouldn't hurt.

[He kissed her hands and lowered them.]

Awesome! Today just got better.

[He raised his head and had a little sniff. It was all he needed to pick up where the smell of fireplace smoke was coming from, denoting the village- the cable cars were nearby, no doubt.]

Nothin' crazy, I promise. I just really like the eggnog here. ...That, and it's so weird that we're the adults among our friends from our home world yet kinda wanna embrace that a little.

I'm glad. You were becoming so tense.

[More reason that she worried and reacted the way she did.]

Mmm... it still seems strange. Even if it was only to get us to cooperate, I wonder if there was any other reason.

[What a rollercoaster of emotions. He needed to maybe get a little more sleep or something; he did pull some super late nights lately... shit, she was rubbing off on him a little.]

Mm. Yeah... I guess I never really thought of why they grabbed the others from when the case was solved, but we're from later.

I mean, if I was still a first-year, I dunno if I'd ever really... y'know, do the Chroma thing. I mean, I wasn't huge on people touchin' me back then, neither. Was still a little cagey.

Yes... I would abhor being touched, and to even go further, I don't think I would be able to reach even that barrier. Holding hands would be difficult enough.

[Kanji sighed in empathy, and nodded. He led the way back.]

Seriously! I couldn't even get people to hold my damn hand if I so much as begged 'em!

But knowin' this planet like I do, how eagerly people offer stuff'd just weird me out. Still kinda does.

...I dunno, is it us, or the product of the country we grew up in? I've been wondering that, lately. Like...

[He shrugged.]

I'm- I'm opening up a lot about what makes me feel good, but would I have gotten to a level of comfort I am now if I was still in Inaba?

... I think it's a mixture. Where we've grown up, public displays of affection are discouraged, even frowned upon by some people. However, as both of us grew up, negative interactions as individuals also discouraged a willingness to open up to people and consequentially, affected our abilities to physically interact with people as a whole.

[She tilted her head, thinking.]

I... don't think so. Perhaps? At least you wouldn't be as open.

[She was right. Compared to everyone else who just needed an open ear, maybe a shoulder to cry on, both Kanji and Naoto were those two stubborn asses who had been forced to grow up early, and had mile-high walls that needed to be scaled before anything else.

...Souji really was a fuckin' saint.

Kanji draped an arm over Naoto's shoulders.]

Yeah, true. It took me two years to tell someone I love 'em. How the hell would I open myself up enough to be...

[He thoughtfully looked skyward.]

...Yeah. Vulnerable's the word. For people like us, goin' down to skin n' open heart's a whole huge thing.

[She leaned against him.]

It is... I'm glad I could be open like this at all. And with you? I appreciate what Senpai did, but I think you understand my predicament better.

[Who was on top of the world? This guy, right here. He looked back down to her.]

I-I feel the same way. I didn't think anybody'd really get what was eatin' me, let alone just... look at me, and see somethin' of some kinda worth.

[He wouldn't admit that, even here, he got comments and critiques when he posted that image of himself with his natural hair. It was like they were saying, 'I like you better when you're trying to be someone you're not'. It made the heart sink. But it also made him doubly determined to march to the beat of his own drum.]

So... uh, m-maybe this sounds weird, but thanks for lookin' at me.

Mmm... if anyone did before me, I would've missed out. Fortunately, I didn't though it did take a while.

[A pox on those who gave Kanji such comments. As long as he could be himself, that's just how she wanted him.]

Thank you for being patient.

[Perhaps his mother pushing for him to be more patient overall had helped him in more regards than just grousing over packages arriving in the mail or being too excited for upcoming events to keep still. Once he'd started slowing down and listening to people, and fighting not to lose his temper even in the worst parts of his life (sans a few mistakes back when he met everyone) that led him to know all the wonderful people that surrounded him now.

As for the woman at his side? Goddamn... who knew he'd meet someone who not only seemed to want to understand him on first sight and quickly grew to become one of his best and closest friends, but this stubborn, clever, secret nerd managed to up and casually hold her hand out, only for him to happily plop his heart right in?

He smiled warmly.]

'Course. Y-you always were with me.

... I wish I could've been with you more.

[But she had made her farewells... and left Inaba. It was the only place that had come to feel like home god knows how long and she just left. It was for work, but when she had said goodbye, she knew she said it in a way that she wouldn't return soon.]

Don't worry.

The way I see it, this place tells me that I gotta make that phone call and hitch a ride on a train. And it's gonna happen, Naoto. I promise.

Edited (wow, i need to learn2reed) Date: 2020-01-11 05:47 am (UTC)

I'll hold you to it.

[And now, she had all the more reason to help everyone leave this place.]

[He laughed quietly. She better! But let's get everyone home first, once the natives here actually explain their energy crisis.

Until then, they had a cable car to catch. Did she have a ticket or a way to go? Kanji rubbed his chin when they arrived.]

Hmm... uh, how do we know which one's ours?

[At the cable cars, Naoto raised her communicator.]

I have the information here. However, they didn't give a car number; just a confirmation we have space reserved.

Yeah? ...Maybe we jus' pick one that's empty n' call dibs.

[He shrugged. Jeez, even dinner reservations had specific tables set aside. But maybe they knew how many cars they had and just went with that as the hard limit.]

I dare someone to try n' kick us outta one. I mean, it's the freakin' holidays.